"Should I wait until I’m sure before I file a report?" In most situations you do not need to wait to have “evidence” of child abuse to file a report to child protective services or police. However, it is always best when there is some symptom, behavior or conversation that you can identify or...
Online Help Center Results
If you’re not really sure they have a problem: Letting someone know that their abusive behaviors are not invisible to others can be an effective measure in helping an adult stay safe from crossing the line with a child. Some adults do not understand fully what behavior is appropriate with children...
Child sexual abuse includes the following touching behaviors. Touching a child's genitals (penis, testicles, vulva, breasts, or anus) for sexual pleasure or to meet the needs of the older child or adult. Making a child touch someone else's genitals, or playing sexual ("pants-down") games. Putting objects or body parts (like fingers, tongue or a penis) inside the vulva or vagina, in the mouth, or in the anus of a child for sexual pleasure or to meet the needs of the older child or adult.
Child sexual abuse can also include behaviors that do not involve touching or physical contact. These behaviors can be just as upsetting and emotionally harmful to a child as some touching behaviors. Non-touching behaviors that are considered to be child sexual abuse include: Showing pornography to...
Danger of the Internet People can get in trouble before they even realize it. When it is so easy to access sexually explicit materials on the Internet, users can find themselves acting on curiosities they didn’t have before. Some people find themselves losing control over their use of pornography,...
Child sexual abuse can be a very confusing topic, both to adults and to children. Below are six clarifications of common misunderstandings many adults have articulated on our Helpline while attempting to make sense out of confusing situations. Child sexual abuse does not have to involve physical...
There is no such thing as a “typical sex offender.” It can be hard to understand how seemingly ordinary people can have sexual thoughts or behaviors towards children. There is also no usual “pathway” to becoming someone who sexually abuses children. People who sexually abuse children can be any...
Thoughts come before action Many people who have sexually abused children report they had sexual thoughts or fantasies about children before they ever acted on them. On the other hand, many people who have sexual thoughts or fantasies about children never act on those thoughts or feelings. Sexual...
It can be hard to understand what causes someone to sexually abuse a child. Just as there is no such thing as a “typical sex offender”, there is no one pathway to becoming someone who sexually abuses children. Treatment providers have said the one thing people who sexually abuse children are most...
You may witness concerning behaviors in other adults, in children, or in yourself. The resources below can help you understand what you are seeing and teach you how you can address these concerns. Tip Sheet: Fifteen Questions About Your Thoughts and Behaviors that Only You Can Answer Tip Sheet:...
There are several ways that a person might sexually exploit a child or youth online. A note about youth internet use Technology is woven into our everyday lives, and it is necessary in many ways even for young children. Young people are spending more time than ever before using devices, and so it...
Someone you care about may be acting in ways that worry or confuse you. The behaviors below could indicate a possible risk that they may sexually abuse a child, but may also be a way for this adult to ask for help. Many people with sexual behavior problems believe that others already suspect they are crossing a line and often wish someone would ask what’s going on or advise them where to go to get help. Remember, you can start a conversation by pointing out harmful impacts on a child without accusing someone of abusive intentions.
We all have personal likes and things that make us uncomfortable. “Personal space” is the private area of control inside an imaginary line or boundary that defines each person as separate. Ideally, that boundary helps us stay in charge of our own personal space. It helps keep out the things that...
Talking to kids can be an important part of prevention. “How much should I explain to them?” Many parents struggle with the question “what do I tell my kids?” As your children grow and mature, each family must decide what works for the culture of their particular household. What is most important...
Sometimes the decision to file is not easy It’s scary to think that making a phone call could change our lives. We can’t know beforehand what will happen after we file. We don’t know if our report will lead to a child getting protection or possibly make things difficult for the child. Sometimes the...
For the person who has been victimized: No matter what is revealed by a child who has eperienced sexual abuse, reassure them that you believe them, that you love them, and that you are committed to helping them. Recognize that many children are not able to speak up about what happened, or may take...
All children are curious about sex. The more children know about their own sexuality, the less likely it is that others will take advantage of them because of their lack of knowledge. Having ongoing conversations with children and teens about their own developing sexuality is an important part of...
Don’t wait. If you are concerned about keeping your child safe from sexual abuse, now is the time to create a safer environment for everyone in your family. Prevention means promoting healthy behaviors rather than waiting to punish violations. The most effective sexual abuse prevention happens...
"I have mixed feelings about filing." More often, concerns lie in a “gray area” of vague uneasiness, sketchy details or uncertainty about what is actually happening. The decision to file a report regarding child abuse of any kind is almost always complicated by the reporter’s relationship to the...
Talking to kids can assist in prevention What do I tell my kids? Many parents struggle with this question. As your children grow and mature, each family must decide what works for the culture of their particular household. What is most important for kids to understand is that abuse is never a child...
“When do I file?” If you suspect a child is being sexually abused, getting the proper help and support is vital. Typically, the situations that require reporting are: A child and/or adult shows numerous and consistent warning signs of abuse or being at risk to abuse A child has stated that he or...
Touching and Non-Touching Behaviors
There are many reasons why it’s difficult to speak about child sexual abuse, especially as it affects our own lives or the lives of those we care about. In most societies child sexual abuse is a taboo topic, making it difficult for most people to talk about it openly. Other obstacles include...