Interview with Joan Tabachnick

Joan Tabachnick served as the Director of Public Education at Stop It Now! for twelve years and created the Helpline’s protocols that contributed to the vision, mission and the practical tools that have helped create Stop It Now! and all that it offers. She is a recognized expert in sex abuse prevention and social marketing and has authored a number of works addressing sex abuse prevention, including  Engaging Bystanders in Effective Prevention and co-authored with Alisa Klein, A Reasoned Approach: Reshaping Sex Offender Policy To Prevent Child Sexual Abuse.

Now!: What role did you envision the HL could play in prevention?

JT: We first realized that just a public education campaign around child sex abuse was not enough unless we could tie them to simple and safe preventive actions. We wanted to create the first step people could take when they heard a Stop It Now! Public Service announcement or read our materials but didn’t know what they could. We particularly wanted to offer a practical step and access to help for anyone at-risk to abuse (adult or adolescent) or their friend or family. Fay Honey Knopp, founder of Safer Society, thought of a helpline as a place where people could ask for help and learn about the resources in their area. We recognized that no one else in the United Sates was offering this kind of help and we wanted to test whether or not anyone would even call.

Now!: Why was the Helpline designated a confidential helpline?

JT: Almost everyone we spoke with thought that confidentiality was important because of the shame we thought people would feel. The idea behind it was that if the caller could talk with someone, break their own isolation and silence, there were more likely to do something. We often talked about a ladder of steps. How do we get someone to take the first step, thinking that the first step is always the hardest? We felt that talking is not enough. So part of our goal was to be sure that every caller would hang up from a Stop It Now! call with a clear idea of what their next step(s) should be.

Now!: What impact now do you think the Helpine is making in prevention?

JT: When we received that first call from someone at-risk to abuse, it showed the world (and Vermont) that there are some people who do want help; that adults or teens who are at-risk for abusing or re-offending will turn to the help if it is offered. As soon as we got that first call, the media stopped asking IF anyone would call, and began to ask WHO is willing to call, why they call, what brought them to call. It moved us into a deeper conversation right away and moved us away from the notion of every sex offender is a “monster” lurking on the edge of our playgrounds. It’s important also to note that after we launched in 1995, Megan’s law came to Vermont, and calls from these adults asking for help for themselves dropped by fifty percent.
It provides a place and creates an opportunity to have conversations that are usually hidden. These conversations have provided the basis for our educational materials. These materials address the real issues we heard each day faced by the HL callers. For example, by hearing some questions over and over again, “How do I talk to someone about their behaviors?” we developed the “Let’s Talk” booklet. Also, we heard caller’s need for concrete steps to take and then developed the concept of a family safety plan, hence the tip sheets on safety planning. Finally, the helpline and listening to the stories behind each call, has kept Now!’s content relevant to what individual and families face every day.

Now!: What surprised you most once the Helpine was up and running?

JT: It takes a very unique person to answer these calls. To acknowledge the difficult situation. To affirm the courage in an adult at-risk to abuse. To encourage the adult calling to take the next step. And to do all of that with compassion. Some people could not hold the complex dance of compassion for the caller with the deep accountability for actions that is needed. We were lucky to open and continue the helpline with so many brilliant and fabulous people over so many years.

Now!: Is there a memorable call/experience regarding the Helpline that has stayed with you and that you can share?

JT: Hearing one mother reach out with concerns, and walking her through the possible warning signs of sexual abuse. This parent called back a couple of more times, each time learning more about what was happening, learning what questions to ask, and addressing her fears about what it meant to eventually make a report. It was a very powerful experience to walk through this with someone and hear the courage it takes for a mother to consider the unthinkable and then have the strength to step in with the people she loved most.

Now!: Is there anything you would like to add?

JT: When we created the Helpline, Stop It Now! could not have created such a ground-breaking resource alone. A lot of people helped us out with protocols. Experienced clinicians with expertise in Vermont were incredibly helpful about running through possible scenarios, helping us set up meetings with the Attorney General, the Defender General and so many other key people in VT, and maybe most importantly, consider how to respond to our callers responsibly. They helped us choose responses that honored both the letter of the law (e.g., mandated reporting), as well as the spirit of these laws. Like the message we gave to our callers, it was best not to act alone, but find the support needed to take the next step.